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I believe it! We receive the lessons we need to learn . . . and we keep receiving /em until we get it at least half-way right. At least, it seemed this way to me recently, when a trip from North Carolina to Oregon took a total of 50+ hours travel time, there and back. The smart aleck mantra, Got time to spare? Go by air! was in my mind as everything that COULD go wrong DID . . . equipment malfunction . . . fog . . . ice . . . crew change . . . lost luggage . . . extended holding patterns . . . emergency rates at an airport hotel . . . except . . .

Except that, in the end, we DID arrive safely at our destinations. Airline personnel were 100% courteous and friendly. A Travelers Aid volunteer pointed us to good-quality food and relatively comfortable chairs for our 12 hours in San Francisco. (Hint: Try the sushi in the International Terminal!)

Patience is a virtue, one hard to come by in a world that counts time in nanoseconds. From soundbites to microwaves, we expect life to come in user-friendly format, and we re quick to take it personally when it doesn t.

DID YOU KNOW:

• The average doctor s visit lasts 8 minutes.
• Some fast food restaurants promise lunch in 90 seconds or it s free.
• The optimum height of a highrise is measured by people s maximum reported toleration of an elevator ride — 15 seconds.
• Most people spend less than 50 seconds brushing their teeth; most people think they spend 3 minutes each time!

And on the other side:

• Customer Service is rapidly becoming one of this country s most stressful job areas. Why? Because, after an average wait of 20 minutes on hold, customers are taking their stress out on the human being who takes their call.

SURELY THERE IS A BETTER WAY?

Back at that fogged-in airport, and the clutch of more-or-less anxious passengers. One expensively-dressed mam puffed himself up, stomped to the podium, and in a voice heard across the crowded waiting area, You don t understand, he shouted. I AM IMPORTANT!

Truth is, we re all of us and none of us important in the larger scheme of things. When big stuff happens, when there s nothing we can do to effect a change . . . then the best thing to do is do nothing. Hunker down. Wait gracefully. Breathe. Give thanks for whatever good things may be.

In The Power of Patience (Broadway, 2003), writer M. J. Ryan offers several simple steps we can take to put ourselves and our life in perspective. I especially like her suggestion to carry a small stone in my pocket. When you start to feel irritation arise, Ryan advises, move the pebble from one pocket to the other, which will help interrupt the anger cycle and give you a chance to regroup.

Pebbles are good. And if, like me, you are often caught without a pocket to your name, may I offer an even easier idea: Extend your hand, palm down. Focus on it yours is unique, unlike any other hand in the world. Now slowly S-T-R-E-T-C-H your fingers. . . Extend them . . . H-O-L-D it . . . and then RELAX.

Relax your fingers.

Relax your hand.

Relax your heart.

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Relax into a slower space, where stakes are by definition lower.

AND NOW . . . WELCOME. WELCOME TO YOUR WORLD.

About the Author

Maureen Killoran is a Life Coach offering dynamic individual and group coaching, work team empowerment training, teleclasses, and a free monthly e-zine, “Seeds of Change.” Watch for Maureen’s forthcoming e-workbook, SpiritQuesting ™ — a non-sectarian path to personal deepening and growth. Why not contact Maureen for a complimentary coaching consultation? http://www.spiritquestcoaching.com

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Parenting A Gifted Child

 by: Mary Joyce

When it comes parenting a gifted child, there are a number of considerations. Probably the most common, is the fact that, as a parent you just are uncertain as to how to respond to the gifted child s unique development and personality traits. This also entails a difficulty in your expectations of the child. Also, one of the unique difficulties in parenting a gifted child stems from the fact that many times, although the child is gifted with advanced cognitive abilities, is still quite on level par with other children of their age in the areas of emotional and physical development. Greater challenges can even arise if you have a gifted child in a family with more than one child. But aside, from all the challenges, parenting a gifted child can be extremely rewarding and joyful because it is truly a very unique experience.

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As any parent would ask How can I best be helpful for my gifted child? Well, first and foremost, do what you do best as a parent and love and care for your child s needs regardless of their specially abilities. Although many of your gifted child s characteristics may be at an advance level when compared to their age group, the basis of parenting really isn t that much different.

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Keep available to your gifted child many areas of opportunity to learn and be challenged.

Encourage your child to remain engaged in a broad range of activities and skills beyond those which they are naturally gifted.

Be supportive

As your child gets older, speak with them about their talents and some of the challenges that they face and why they are special.

Constantly teach and fine tune their social skills so they remain comfortable socially.

As a proud parent… don t push or show off your child.

Don t expect your child to be gifted and talented in everything.

Above all… don t forget that your gifted child is still very much a child. Still needing all the love, caring, and support that any child needs and thrives on.

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